The Dim Stethoscope

You see them in isolation rooms. They are usually referred to as Fake Stethoscopes. They are made by Fake Incorporated.

Sometimes they are referred to as "Dim Stethoscopes." It's because you can't hear lung sounds for crap. So, you find yourself just writing or clicking, "Diminished."

And sometimes you don't even bother using it. I mean, it's been in the same room as a MRSA patient for a week now. And the lung sounds have been the same since the patient arrived.

And so you just scan the patient. You start the treatment. And you just (if no one is looking, that is) go right to charting. And, without even touching the Dim stethoscope, you click: "Diminished."

There is one exception. If the patient is wet. That's the exception. Because, if that's why the doctor ordered it, it's mainly because of that audible cardiac wheeze. You don't need a stethoscope to here it. So, you can then click on "Wheeze"

So, that's your prototypical dim stethoscope. The patient is dim whether you use it or not, so you might as well just not. But, usually you do. But, still, it's dim and dimmer. Thoughts?