Now Hospital Policy Requires Goggles When Reading

RT Boss displaying new goggles.

You heard it here first. The Federal Agency for Efficiency (FAKE) has created a new regulation requiring goggles. They must be worn by employers who are on the clock when reading magazines.

I was kind of confused when I learned of this policy. It came down to me via the respiratory care manager at Shoreline Medical Center. He said he was required to write a hospital policy for Goggle Management.

I inquired as to why this policy was created. He said it passed the FAKE board by a vote of 8-1. The policy is expected to prevent wisdom from magazines from splattering off the pages of said magazines and offering wisdom to readers.

The goal here is to prevent workers from getting smarter. If they remain dumb, it's easier for said individuals to become brainwashed by top management officials. Ditto for government officials.

I called Mike Wisdom, the chair of the Fake Committee. He said "This is just the beginning. You can basically call this the test phase. The next step is to create a Goggle Regulation for students attending public schools. This goal, henceforth, is to prevent students from obtaining too much wisdom."

Personally, I think there is an underlying agenda here. You have government officials that try to tell people that raising their taxes will somehow prevent global warming. Like, I'm skeptical of the idea that raising my taxes will somehow prevent hurricanes and prevent ice glaciers from melting.

I think this is how they prevent doctors from questioning cook book medicine. Doctors, for years, treated every patient on an individual basis. If something wasn't need it, they didn't do it. This makes sense both in a medical fashion and for financial purposes. Now, however, doctors have accepted cookbook medicine. I think one of the reasons is because of Goggle Management. By keeping them stupid they don't question authority. They, in essence, become sheep.

The kind of thinking that I just did in the last two paragraphs is the exact kind of thinking the powers that be want to prevent, hence the Goggle Regulation and Goggle Policy at Shoreline Medical Center.

Punishment for not complying is a 10% wage cut. So, you can try not wearing goggles when sitting in your RT Cave. If you're like us, your cave is in a closet in the dark corner of the hospital basement. So, like, we risk not wearing the goggles.

And the fact that we do this is why I write this post sort of facetiously. Like, we don't want to be busted. But, if you can read between the lines, you know what I mean.