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Saturday, April 9, 2011

Ventolin now cure for lung itchiness

There are certain things during the course of life that you simply can't make up. As when I was called to the ER today to do a breathing treatment, the doctor stopped me before I entered the room and said, with a smile, "Tonight your Albuterol is going to have some lung scratching components. Can you do that?"

"Sure," I said, "I can put anything in the nebulizer you want?"

He laughed, and said, "The reason I said that is because her lungs are clear, yet she's complaining of itchy lungs."

"Oh, I see," I said, smiling, and entered the patient's room.

"So," I said, "What's your last name?" Of course I knew, I was just being politically correct. And she told me wit a slight giggle. "Are you short of breath?" I said.

"No," she giggled, "My lungs are just feeling a little itchy." Then she added a, "well, I guess."

I worked hard to hold back my laughter. It was hard to take this seriously.

After the treatment I said, "So, are your lungs feeling better?"

"Yeah, they are a little less itchy."

I walked out of the room, and the doctor pulled me aside again. He laughed as he said, "I'm sorry to bother you for this treatment. She's a little short of her other meds I imagine and there's nothing wrong with her.

"I know what you mean," I said. "I believe the little finger nail qualities that are connected to the Albuterol particles got deep down into her lung tissue and scratched and scratched and scratched until the pulmonary itchiness was gone." I said.

"Yeah," he laughed, "And I told her if I give her a breathing treatment and it makes her feel better she can go home. I figured that would be a good incentive for her to get better quickly."

"Well, good news doc. It worked."

I added this to my list of Ventolin Types. We'll call this one Bronchoscratcholin. You can see a list of all the 'olins by clicking here.

Look folks, you can't make this stuff up.

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